Silas David Fox: A Birth Story
It’s been awhile since Silas joined us, but I’m finally finding some pockets of time to sit down and write out his birth story. It was a wild ride. But, I’m so excited to write it out and relive that crazy day.
He was born on a Sunday and about a week and a half before that (Tuesday), I had my membranes stripped. And then the next day (Wednesday) I lost my mucus plug and immediately felt different. I was more crampy, uncomfortable, my emotions shifted…I just felt different. And then 10 very long days came and passed. In those 10 days, I had my membranes stripped two more times and every time I went to my doctor I was dilated one more centimeter. The last check I had was five days before he was born and was 4 centimeters and fully effaced. The nurse was joking that “this baby was just going to slip out of you!”. I didn’t want to let comments like that give me the impression that it was going to be easy or quick, because regardless of what happened, I knew it would be painful.
To give a little back story, my first birth resulted in an emergency c-section after naturally laboring until I was 10 cm. They discovered he was breech when I started pushing. My second birth was an induction because my bag of waters was leaking, but I wasn’t going into labor. And pitocin was terrible so I ended up with an epidural because mentally I could no longer do it. Mostly because of personal things happening at the time (you can read about it here).
So, for this entire pregnancy I had been praying for a redemptive birth. At this point, I had labored naturally until 10cm, but didn’t push a baby out. And then I did have a vaginal birth but with an epidural. I just wanted a simple, not complicated vaginal birth with no drugs or interventions.
In the 10 days before he was born, I was having mild contractions all day, every day. They weren’t anything that painful, just a tightening that I would have throughout the day. And he was SO SO low. Like SO low. Hence the nurses comment about him “slipping out”.
Because I was having another vaginal delivery after a cesarean, the typical “rules” are that I would need to be induced right at 40 weeks, which was the Thursday before he was born. But I talked to my doctor and she agreed to let me go to 41 weeks before inducing me.
The day he was born was Easter Sunday and I knew that I would have the baby that coming week no matter what because of the impending induction. I obviously did not want to get induced, but I had come to terms with it. Easter was an incredibly fun and busy day. We went to church at my parents church, had an Easter egg hunt there, came home for lunch and another Easter egg hunt, went for a walk, and then got ready to go to our church. After church we had a family dinner and since the day was busy, we rushed our kids off to bed because they were getting into bed late.
And by bedtime, my body was so tired that I just wanted to lay down. At this point, I had really come to terms with the fact that I would get induced and I was going to fully enjoy the next three days I had with my kids. I would plan some fun outings, I would bail on work, and just make the most out of our time together. I was actually in a really great place mentally and my sour mood had melted (mostly) away!
Sunday night (Easter), Joel and I watched some shows and around 10:15pm I started to get ready for bed. I even remember thinking that I hadn’t had that many contractions that day so I definitely wasn’t expecting to go into labor. The lights were still on in our room, but at 10:30, I rolled over to go to bed. And immediately I had a contraction. Now, I had been having contractions for weeks at this point and they usually got stronger at night because I was finally relaxed. It felt a LITTLE stronger than normal, but not much. But immediately after that, I had another one. And it was stronger than the previous one 20 seconds prior. I got up to go to the bathroom to see if maybe my water was leaking, but nothing. So, I walked back to our room and immediately had another contraction, and this one was stronger than the previous one. I braced myself on the edge of our bed and my legs started shaking. At this point, I said “Joel, I think I’m having a contraction.” He took one look at me and saw my shaking legs and called my mom immediately. We looked back on his phone and he called her at 10:31pm. I then moved to bracing myself on my nightstand and kept saying “I’m not sure this is it. I was going to bed. I want to go to bed. No, this isn’t happening, I’m going to bed”. DENIAL. My parents live across the street and my sister was visiting for Easter, so both my mom and sister arrived within a minute or two. My mom took one look at me and said “you need to leave now.” I guess I had the crazy eyes, ha.
At this point, I couldn’t talk much or think straight. I just walked to the car. The bag wasn’t fully packed and Joel was trying to ask me what else I needed, but I literally could not converse with him. Every contraction was stronger than the one prior and they were happening on top of eachother. I got into the car but couldn’t sit so I kneeled on the floor facing the seat. I remember being able to send ONE text message to a friend and it said “goofing to hospital” and it was sent at 10:39pm and I sent it as we drove away from our house. Luckily, the hospital is about 6 minutes away so we got there pretty quick. Joel parked in a 15 minute parking spot right outside the main entrance but it closes at 9pm, so then I had to walk to the ER entrance while in the midst of contractions. We got to the elevator and then the Labor and Delivery unit. At this point, I was in transition and could not speak. I was definitely making sounds though, haha. If you know, you know. I was bracing myself on the counter just begging for a nurse and they assured me someone was coming in just a second. The nurse came out, took me to triage and I was starting to push. She got me to the closest labor room and I just stood alongside the side of the bed and braced myself with my hands and forearms. She asked me if I could get in the bed so she could check me and I just said no. She checked me while I was standing up and said “8-9cm” and I moaned and said “nooo, that means I can’t get an epidural!!!” which is hilarious because I didn’t want one at all. But the fact that there was no option and I had to keep going was overwhelming. The pain was…indescribable. And it was happening so fast. It was hard to mentally catch up to what was happening physically. I was truly in shock and not able to think straight. The doctor was preoccupied with another delivery so a midwife was in the room with me along with a gaggle of nurses. They assured me I was just a few contractions away from having a baby in my arms. I just kept saying “I can’t do this” because the pain was truly…unimaginable. But then I just started saying (begging) “Jesus, help me, help me.” There was a nurse on the other side of the table holding my right hand while Joel was on my left side holding my left hand. She started praying over me outloud (I don’t remember hearing this, but Joel does!) and coaching me. I just remember feeling like my body was being ripped in half and screaming….HA. I don’t know exactly how much time passed, but at 11:09 he was born. I think I pushed 3-4 times and I delivered him standing up. We left our house at 10:39pm, so he was born 30 minutes after we left. The midwife caught him and handed him to me immediately. It was pretty amazing and spectacular to deliver him that way.
A very sweet part of this story is that I really wanted the midwives to deliver this baby, but because I had a c-section previously, they could not accept me as a patient. AND, normally anyone who is doing a VBAC, needs 2 IVs. But no one had time or knew that I was a VBAC, so I never got any IVs, which is amazing. I hate needles, especially IVs. And a midwife got to deliver him. And I got my natural birth with no interventions or drugs :) The fact that a midwife delivered him and I didn’t get any IVs was just such a kind blessing from God. There’s no way those things could have happened under normal circumstances. Such a sweet blessing.
An hour before he was born, I was watching a TV show in bed. It happened so so fast, I was honestly in shock. Joel and I said to each other probably 10 times “I can’t believe that just happened.”
The night before he was born, I had a dream that I had the baby and his name was Silas. He had a list of 3 names and we were just trying to decide between them. Joel was on team Silas and I wasn’t there yet. But because of the dream, I woke up on Easter Sunday knowing that we needed to name him Silas. And before Easter was over, he was born!
Looking back now, we wouldn’t have made it to the hospital if my parents didn’t live across the street. We would have been waiting for them to arrive and by the time they got there, I wouldn’t have been able to get in a car and drive. And because it was happening so fast, I don’t know how I would have done it without the nurses and midwife looking me in the eyes and saying “this baby is coming NOW.” I was honestly in such shock, I don’t know if I would have been able to get him out otherwise. It was just a wild 30 minutes and yet, there’s so many tiny details that remind me of God’s goodness.
Thankfully, recovery was pretty smooth and easy. And the transition to a family of five has also been smooth sailing, so far. He’s the perfect little addition to our crew & now I can’t imagine life without him. It’s crazy how your heart grows in an instant. We’re blessed and thankful for our precious Silas. His name means “prayed for or asked for” and we truly feel that. He was exactly who we prayed and asked for and I’m so grateful I get to be his mama.
